Unpacking Childhood Mechanisms in Inner Conflict

Ever feel paralysed by fear when you want to express something? This is often an internalised childhood mechanism at play. Imagine a moment of hesitation—part of you wants to speak up, but another part silences you out of fear.

In childhood, we learn survival strategies. If expressing sadness or desire led to criticism or rejection, an Anger/Intimidation part may have formed to suppress the Sadness/Expressive part, creating a Fear/Paralysed part. This keeps us compliant, avoiding perceived threats like abandonment or disapproval.

By tracing this mechanism back—perhaps to a childhood moment of being shamed for asking a question—we see how these patterns persist. The intimidating part, once protective, now prevents authentic expression. But as adults, we no longer need this defence.

Bringing awareness and sensitivity to these parts allows healing. Instead of shutting down, we can recognise that sadness and rejection are not life-threatening. Integrating these parts with understanding helps shift from fear-based paralysis to authentic self-expression.